Friday 28 November 2008

Things That Are Wrong

Women's Lib

LOL ROFL LMAO ETC

Below is the complete email conversation that Adelaide man David Thorne claims he had with a utility company chasing payment of an overdue bill.

From: Jane Gilles
Date: Wednesday 8 Oct 2008 12.19pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Overdue account

Dear David,
Our records indicate that your account is overdue by the amount of $233.95. If you have already made this payment please contact us within the next 7 days to confirm payment has been applied to your account and is no longer outstanding.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles


From: David Thorne
Date: Wednesday 8 Oct 2008 12.37pm
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,
I do not have any money so am sending you this drawing I did of a spider instead. I value the drawing at $233.95 so trust that this settles the matter.

Regards, David.



From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 10.07am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Overdue account

Dear David,
Thankyou for contacting us. Unfortunately we are unable to accept drawings as payment and your account remains in arrears of $233.95. Please contact us within the next 7 days to confirm payment has been applied to your account and is no longer outstanding.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles


From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 10.32am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,
Can I have my drawing of a spider back then please.

Regards, David.


From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 11.42am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Overdue account

Dear David,
You emailed the drawing to me. Do you want me to email it back to you?

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles


From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 11.56am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,

Yes please.

Regards, David.


From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 12.14pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Overdue account

Attached



From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 09.22am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Whose spider is that?

Dear Jane, Are you sure this drawing of a spider is the one I sent you? This spider only has seven legs and I do not feel I would have made such an elementary mistake when I drew it.

Regards, David.


From: Jane Gilles
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.03am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Whose spider is that?

Dear David, Yes it is the same drawing. I copied and pasted it from the email you sent me on the 8th. David your account is still overdue by the amount of $233.95. Please make this payment as soon as possible.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles


From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.05am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Automated Out of Office Response

Thankyou for contacting me. I am currently away on leave, traveling through time and will be returning last week.

Regards, David.


From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.08am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Hello, I am back and have read through your emails and accept that despite missing a leg, that drawing of a spider may indeed be the one I sent you. I realise with hindsight that it is possible you rejected the drawing of a spider due to this obvious limb ommission but did not point it out in an effort to avoid hurting my feelings. As such, I am sending you a revised drawing with the correct number of legs as full payment for any amount outstanding. I trust this will bring the matter to a conclusion.

Regards, David.



From: Jane Gilles
Date: Monday 13 Oct 2008 2.51pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Dear David, As I have stated, we do not accept drawings in lei of money for accounts outstanding. We accept cheque, bank cheque, money order or cash. Please make a payment this week to avoid incurring any additional fees.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles


From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 13 Oct 2008 3.17pm
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

I understand and will definately make a payment this week if I remember. As you have not accepted my second drawing as payment, please return the drawing to me as soon as possible. It was silly of me to assume I could provide you with something of completely no value whatsoever, waste your time and then attach such a large amount to it.

Regards, David.


From: Jane Gilles
Date: Tuesday 14 Oct 2008 11.18am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Attached


Recommend this article. 16673 Flocks so far
Flock It!

Sunday 23 November 2008

Flashing The Flesh. Or Not...

I know you've already seen this on Kanye's blog...



But still....







Catsmas Is Coming

Trippyest shit ever



Totally creepy, yet utterly hypnotic.

Monday 10 November 2008

Photoshop Of The Day

This is rumoured to be Whitney Houston's new album cover




Prizes for anyone who can guess whose body / face / hair was used to make this particular picture of 'Whitney' - because it sure as hell wasn't her!

Wednesday 5 November 2008

Just. Plain. Wrong.

Spooky Dogs

Pissing Money Away

A little industry news for you:

So, The EMI Group managed to lose £757 million in its last financial year, and another £287 million loss the previous year.


Wow.


That's pretty impressive...


Could these possibly be contributing factors?
5 amusing (or terrifying) facts about EMI in 2007 courtesy of the Maltby report and the Financial Times…

1. 88 per cent of its artists make a loss.

2. Some employees were paid in the past at salaries that were double market rates or higher.

3. Almost 50 per cent of CDs were returned unsold in April and May 2007

4. More than £700,000 was spent by EMI on taxis in London in the past year (it was the fourth biggest taxi account in London behind three investment banks with much bigger workforces).

5. EMI Music Publishing accounted for more than 100 per cent of EMI’s earnings in 2007, which I’m not sure even makes sense.


Now I'm hardly reknowned for my business brain, but even I can see that something doesn't quite add up here...

Hmmmm

It Was All A Dream....



OK so I'm a little slow - OK a lot slow on this one... But I'm pretty excited.

I just wish I'd seen it before Halloween - it would have inspired me to dress up as Lil Kim just for the LOLs

Next year. Next year....

Monday 27 October 2008




Banjo player Eddie Adcock recently had brain surgery where surgeons installed deep brain stimulator electrodes to control a tremor in his right hand. Patients are sometimes kept awake during brain surgery to interact with the surgeon and help guide the procedure. In Adcock's case, he played the banjo as the surgeon worked. From Eddie and Martha Adcock's site:

Now you can truly call Eddie Adcock the Bionic Banjo Player --and don't forget Gearhead Guitarist-- as he recovers from some remarkable brain surgeries to control a right-hand tremor.

The three-part surgery, termed Deep Brain Stimulation, involved implantation of electrodes into the brain as well as insertion of a palm-sized battery-powered generator within the chest wall, plus lead wires to connect the two. The technologically-advanced procedure was performed in multiple stages over the month of August in Nashville, Tennessee, at Vanderbilt Medical Center, a teaching and research hospital which is a world leader in neurological studies and surgeries.

Those neurosurgeons were eager to operate on Eddie, with his life-long high level of musical accomplishment and the unique requirements related to his fine motor skills. During the brain-implantation stage of the surgery, he was kept conscious in order to be able to play his Deering GoodTime banjo and assist the team of surgeons in directing the fine-tuning of their placement of electrodes in the brain -- an operating-room 'first'.

According to Eddie, "I came up in music the hard way and learned to be a trouper fast. Some of those early days were pretty rough, and I've been stomped, cut and kicked; but I never went through hell like this -- it was the most painful thing I've ever endured. And it was risky. But I did it for a reason: I'm looking forward to being able to play music the way I did years ago prior to getting this tremor. It means that much to me. I'm far from being done!"

Brain surgery and the banjo player (Thanks, Sean Ness!)


http://tinyurl.com/5mwbmh


www.boingboing.net

Tuesday 21 October 2008

Thursday 16 October 2008

Super LOLs

Am I the only one who finds this really funny?




Am I immature?

Clown Shoes

Nike Blazer High NBA




Is it wrong not to like these?

I think they look like Clown Shoes.

Does this mean I'm getting old?




Help!

Tuesday 14 October 2008

No Homo

I don't know why, but I find this strangely appealing & somewhat hypnotic

Cyber Love

Sometimes Fan Made videos really suck.
This one doesn't.





Hot Chip covering Marvin Gaye's steamy classic "Sexual Healing"

Thursday 2 October 2008

The Ghost of Internet Past

O Hai!

Are you a bit bored?

Time to kill...?



Rather than surfing the web for lolcats or porn, why not try googling the past? To celebrate their 10th birthday Google have re-released their web search from January 2001. So if you want to see what the words "ipod", "myspace" or even "Osama Bin Laden" meant to us back then go to:

http://www.google.com/search2001.html

Monday 29 September 2008

Now You See Me, Now You... Umm, Still Do

OH EM GEEEEZ!

This is why I want to live in Japan:

They come up with awesome / awesomely bad ideas like these...


So. A skirt which, with a quick twist, becomes a 'vending machine'.
Thus totally fooling any would-be muggers (duh, they can't find you!)


Step 1




Step 2.




TA-DA!


Grandad Derek

PART I


DJ Derek pt. 1 from Jamie Foord on Vimeo.

PART II


DJ Derek pt. 2 from Jamie Foord on Vimeo.

Sunday 28 September 2008

Wowee!

Oh That's What's Up

Boys who ride BMXes are like sooo sexie


Skavenger Pop Off... Mini Vid... Off Pop from Defgrip on Vimeo.

Buffness.

If I dated a boy who rode a BMX I'd feel like the coolest girl in the world.

Thursday 25 September 2008

Epic Fail

Which bright spark thought it would be a good idea to put up this




in this particular spot?




Not a particularly sensitive media buy... But funny nonetheless

Monday 22 September 2008

Well If This Doesn't Cheer You Up....



Possibly the happiest chaps in the world.... If I was going to share a cab I would want it to be with these guys - I bloody love a sing-a-long!

Most. Fun. Ever

Wednesday 17 September 2008

Oh, Now I Get It....

I never got Bon Iver until now.

I was sent this & it's beaut.




Bon Iver & Bowerbirds cover Sarah Siskind's "Lovin's for Fools" at the Bowery Ballroom, New York, on July 29, 2008

It's about a woman telling her husband to be with his mistress.
Emotional stuff.

Friday 12 September 2008

Horrendous!

Oh God this is awful.
Truly.
An abortion of a song.

Kanye West - 'Love Lockdown'



I mean I kind of see where he was going with it, the concept in fairness, is cool...
Only 1) 'Ye can't sing 2) Autotune is Waaay played out (thanks T-Pain) & 3) It's just really shit

I hope KanYe doesn't come & unleash his "Give a black man a chance" rant on me for this post...
?

Thursday 11 September 2008

President Palin...?

WTF??

Matt Damon's started talking sense?
Since when did that ever happen?





In this video he actually raises some really important points... It pretty much struck terror into my heart whilst managing to make me LOL at the same time. Impressive.

Wednesday 10 September 2008

My Hero!

Dr Brian Cox.




I'll say it again, Dr Brian Cox.





Mmmmmm.....



He is my hero for many many reasons, however this quote from him today made me resurrect my MASSIVE crush on him:

"anyone who thinks the LHC will cause the end of the world is a twat"


So. The Large Hadron Collider experiment. Something of an anti-climax, no...?

Personally I think its one of the most, perhaps not exciting, but certainly intriguing things my generation will play a part in. It has the potential to revolutionise the way we view view the world - or rather, the universe. Clearly not too many people are quite as interested in it as I am, but I've always been a massive science geek & find shit like this fascinating...

Anyway, the world hasn't imploded. Yet... But this is one project I'll be keeping an eye on.

Not least because one of the scientists involved in the programme is the dishy Dr Brian Cox, what a hottie! Ha! He's so beaut & sweet & smart. I am hopelessly in love with him
*sigh*

Telemegaphone

Ever wanted to get things of your chest?



Run to the top of a mountain and scream down at everybody below?



Well now you can (sort of) & it's all thanks to an art project by some company called 'Unsworn'.
"The Telemegaphone automatically answers incoming phone calls and broadcasts them across a fjord in idyllic Western Norway down to the remote town of Dale. The project addresses Blah Blah Blah Innovative, provocative and exciting, the Telemegaphone is just plain old fun. Enjoy."

Well who hasn't wished for something a little like this after a hard day's slog at the office...?

Right. I'm off to make that call....


Here it is in all it's, ummm, glory >

Tuesday 26 August 2008

The Voice Of An Angel

Oh Britney, Britney, Britney...

While we were never resting under the illusion that you were in possesion of The World's Greatest Singing Voice TM, this is still kind of atrocious:



I mean yeah, my voice would sound pretty shitty too if I was all out of breath. But then I don't earn millions of dollars from CD sales...

Tuesday 12 August 2008

Shafted

Sad news that Sientologist Isaac Hayes died this week. Why couldn't it have been Tom Cruise instead...?

Hair Care

There's been a whole load of controversy over THAT L'Oreal advert featuring Beyonce... Not a good look by the way L'Oreal. You gave her jaundice. The yellowest picture I've ever seen...



However at least it detracts from the fact that they used a picture of a woman wearing some front lace wig to promote hair care products (natural hair care products)

False advertising surely...?

Tuesday 5 August 2008

Joy Division



Out 25th August. Just in time for my birthday.

Put A Donk On It

The Blackout Crew: So appalling, I think they just gave my ears cancer





Kind of funny though...

"Fat as hell without cellulite / & I look well sick in a UV light"

!!!

Monday 4 August 2008

Weezy :: Remixed

Please allow his horrendous outfit as he is clearly a very talented boy



...although waaay too much time on his hands!

Man needs to get LAID

Friday 1 August 2008

Barack The Magnificent

Wow.

Sometimes a piece of music will come along that touches you so deeply your life is changed forever. This could be one of those moments...

So you're American & are preparing to vote in the upcoming presidential elections - what do you do? Research your candidate's policies maybe...? Wrong.
For all those swing voters who haven't quite made up their minds, this is sure to convince you.

Dutttywiiiiiiiiiiine!



Mighty Sparrow: Barack The Magnificent

Wednesday 30 July 2008

Kate Bush

It's one of my favourite artist's birthday today

Kate Bush turns (whisper it) fifty

Here's a picture of her looking pretty awesome




and not so awesome...




Ah I don't mean it, she's still the best!

Happiness...

It's the simple things in life: Whiskers on kittens... Bright copper kettles... Warm woolen mittens... Oh, & dogs playing theremins.

MARS plays Theremin


This makes me happy. That really is all it takes.

Sunday 13 July 2008

LOL

OK, there's a site called postsecret (postsecret.blogspot.com) & every Sunday they put up postcards that readers have made with their deepest darkest secrets on. I saw this on it today & it made me laugh out loud :-D



Now that is some wierd shit!

The Worst Thing I've Ever Seen. Ever.



Courtesy of thesaurus.com:

horrendous. Bloodcurdling, hair-raising, horrid, horrific, abhorrent, abominable, appalling, atrocious, awful, cruel, despicable, detestable, dire, dreadful, excruciating, execrable, fearful, formidable, ghastly, grim, grisly, gruesome, harrowing, heinous, hideous, loathsome, mean, nasty, nefarious, obnoxious, repulsive, revolting, shocking, terrible, ugly, unbearable, ungodly, unpleasant, unspeakable, vile, lurid, macabre



What kind of pervert would wear this shit??!

I'm assuming they handed over money for them. This is how you know you do waaaay too many drugs.

How I Spend My Evenings

So here's how I spend my evenings: Going to gigs.

These are some of my most recent pictures >>>>

The Futureheads



Metronomy



Golden Silvers



Young Knives



Pivot



Wild Beasts



they get two pictures because they're so lovely...



Barringtone



Liam Finn



Hercules & Love Affair



Jay-Z



This is how close I was....front row you know!



...and with a little zoom...



Foals



Shit photo - I got there too late to get a decent place to stand :-(


Black Kids




And coming up in the next couple of weeks I have >>>

Liam Finn (again), Esser, Jeremy Warmsley & So So Modern on the Transgressive Summer Tour
Wetdog Album Launch
Lovebox
Wild Beasts (again)
Micachu

Friday 4 July 2008

Homesick? Me...?

Hmmm. There's a strong possibilty that I may be feeling a little homesick today...
Why else would I be scouring You Tube for this >>>



I can confirm that that is how all Geordies dance. Fact.

Rather than sending us to ballet classes or to some lovely stage school, we are perched atop Byker Wall, given several bottles of White Lightning (Lambrini if you're posh) & have lit tabs thrown at our feet til these particularly awesome moves are honed to perfection.

Don't be jealous.

One more from Benwell Raving Crew >>>



HA!

Here, that's better than Riverdance like...

OK so one more video which I would like to dedicate to my home town:
It's Uncle Buzzcocks!



More lethal than a spakka with a bag of pills!

5HTP For The Ears

This >>>




In the last week I must have had all of, oooh 5 hours sleep?

There's only one thing for it. It's time to crack open the Kate Bush.

The video for Wuthering Heights never fails to perk me up. So whenever I'm tired, hungover & hating my life I pay a visit to good old You Tube

Obviously it's even more enjoyable when you are able to throw on a wedding dress, bust out some dance moves & have a little singalong too... but I'll save that for when i get home....

Tuesday 1 July 2008

Bette



Doesn't this picture make you just want to kill yourself because you will never be like her...?


Plus I just read this: (on The Lipster, where else?)

"Bette was the vanguard of celebrity bitchin’ with her ongoing sparring-partner Joan Crawford. When asked why she avoided Crawford at parties, Bette replied: "You hang around that woman long enough and you'll pick up all kinds of useless shit." And, famously, "She's slept with every male star at MGM except Lassie." It's even rumoured that she had a Coca-Cola machine installed on the set of ...Baby Jane as a dig at Crawford, whose husband, a CEO of Pepsi, had just died. Take that, Paris and Nicole"

Ok, so maybe the coke machine was taking it a little far, but still way more interesting than the never ending Bland spewed out by many of Hollywood's current 'stars'

Disco 2000

Not all cover versions are bad
This one is good
Very good



Makes me wish my name was Deborah...


re: Good Cover Versions - may I also recommend Candi Statton 'Stand By Your Man', The Slits 'Heard It Through The Grapevine' & errr..... Boyzone 'Father & Son'?

Actually, no wait. Forget that last one....

The Pitter Patter Of Tiny... Stillettos...?


I don't know whether to laugh or cry.... Maybe both?

Sold with the tag line:
"Now baby girls can really kick up their heels!"

So I dunno if this is really wrong or really fun, but I'm going to post anyway. There's been a whole load of drama about 'the sexualisation of babies', but looking at the picture above I don't think that really rings true - to me it's just a bit of silliness. However that may just be because I don't have a maternal bone in my body...

Who knows. Who cares.

Big Bad Wolf



Grrrrr

Best. Toy. Ever

I'm killing myself that I wasn't in the US over April & that I wasn't munching on a McDonalds....

Meet New Wave Nigel



Given away as a part of McDonalds' American Idol promotion it's pretty much Devo in your pocket. Which beats even the Hello Kitty pen holder I got from the Golden Arches last time I was in the states. Ugh, it even plays a little tune.... The US gets way cooler toys than us.

Anyway the story behind it is that, yes it is a blatant rip off of Devo & that, yes Devo are now suing.

All I care about is how much these bad boys are selling for on Ebay & how soon they can be shipped

Tuesday 17 June 2008

Hollywood Misogyny

I read this news story today & it absolutely disgusted me.
I understand fully the importance of aesthetics in the media - however this reeks of playground bullying...
Plus what really riles me is that these 'Image-Nazis' direct their bile almost soley at women


"... HEROES star ALI LARTER was once treated like an outcast on a film set after discovering how cruel Hollywood can be to an actress who gains weight.
The sexy star admits producers and directors stopped talking to her after she piled on the pounds while shooting a film on location.
She tells the new issue of Allure magazine, "The faxes went out from the producers and the director to my agents to my manager to call me and ask me to lose weight.
"I just remember sitting in my trailer hysterically crying from the embarrassment I felt about myself, my body - and that no one could talk to me directly." ...."


I don't really know or care who Ali Larter is - I don't even know if she's particularly overweight - but I do know that this is a pretty despicable way to treat a human being.
I think what's most insulting is the cowardly way they went about it...

"producers and directors stopped talking to her"


Seriously...?! Since when were eight year old girls directing movies...?



Were this any other industry they would have been slapped with some fat lawsuit for workplace bullying

Hollywood is the best!

Cover Artwork

Despite doing nothing more exciting last night than stocking up on macaroni cheese ready meals at Sainsburys, I am so tired today I feel like my eyes are going to fall out

In an effort to perk myself up I decided to do a little research into album artwork:

Here are some of the finest examples of graphic design & photography I could find >>>



Oh yeah



Speechless.

.............



This last one I found funny before I even noticed what was going on in the picture - or read the title for that matter. I just liked that it was captioned "Truly A Miracle Of God" & had a picture of a happy old lady on it... When I realised the true extent of the whole entire wrongness of it I had to pick myself up off the floor



I like to imagine she's called Marjorie, has a never ending supply of biscuits & gives good hugs